Last Friday after work, I attended this seminar called “Incompletely Complete” which talked about relationship plans—how individuals and couples find completion in their search for a life partner.

The guest speaker was Jessica Kwan who five years ago had answered God’s call to serve in full-time ministry because of her love for Him and an immense passion in mentoring young adults.

With extensive pastoral and mentoring experience with young adults in her church and integrated creative approaches and open dialogue, she motivates young people to reflect on who they are; identify their passions, potential and principles; and help them negotiate personal and professional challenges.

Here are my top three key takeaways from the talk:

  1. Every one of us is already complete (even if we’re still single), with God as the center of our lives as he had surrendered to cast our sins away. If we practice and uplift our good relationship with Him, then we have already met this criterion of having a well, absolute life.
  2. However, we will be further complete or completely complete if we’re to be with a man or woman as partner in marriage. Since He created every being to be in the likeness of Himself, then if we experience “the other” of us through our relationship with the opposite sex by love and submission, we become fully united with the Creator.
  3. We cannot super confirm or double confirm if he or she is the ONE for us (by God’s rightful plan) unless we get to know the other person better through time, and nothing prepares us in correctly answering the question before the after-marriage events.
  4. We will have problems regardless we’re single or married.For singles, external and internal pressures come in the way often. Examples are those from family members, attached friends, media and the social culture who would push singles especially in the late twenties to early thirties and ask them whenever they meet the million-dollar question: “Why are you still single?” And then, they’d try to introduce and match-make him/her with whom they think is suitable.

    Oftentimes, these don’t work, and the problems arise over and over again. Tip: If you feel irritated and bothered of people asking you the big question repeatedly, you can ask in return, “Why are you so ugly?” (I couldn’t stop laughing when Nalinee, the host, cracked the joke.) Why? I think it’s effective! Both wouldn’t have straight answers. And both parties would feel appalled! (Hey, at least you have your retribution next time, you know.)

    For married couples, we know that every bit of decisions and perceptions are different so understanding each other and having a give-and-take relationship are really important.

    Marriage is a wonderful thing designed by God, but it’s not perfect and it’s certainly no fairy tale; it is one of the greatest blessings and deepest joys, but it also takes work and sacrifice.

    The best way we can prepare for it is to run after God with everything we have. He will bring the togetherness in us so that we can do more than we ever could apart–and no classic fairy tale can pull this off.

The Don’ts:

“Do not marry the person you think you can live with but the one you can’t live without.”

This person should not complete us but complement us.

“Do not marry someone who has characteristics you feel are intolerable.”

You may plan to change him or her in the future, but that probably won’t happen.

“Do not marry impulsively.”

Marriage is a critical decision we should not leap into without careful thought and prayer.

I hope you’ve learned something from this post. Thanks for reading! Also, thanks to Lynn and company for having us taste her baked potatoes before the talk began. It was delicious!

Hello to MommyLou, my faithful cute rabbit, who I was thinking about during the entire talk. Who loves you? Me. ღ♥ღ See you soon! : )


Health and technology freak. Food and lifestyle blogger with a large appetite for food and travel.

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